|"Flora" Merab Gagiladze|
I sometimes can develop tunnel vision and I put all of me into one area. Who am I kidding? I do this quite frequently actually. I guess that is part of an addictive personality. I openly admit to being addicted to coffee. I used to be addicted to cigarettes. It wasn't uncommon for me to smoke two packs if I was out at the bars with my friends. I am sometimes addicted to starving myself. Creepy, I know, but it is true. I get a high from it. Eating disorders are awesome (sarcasm). When I was on my exercise kick I was addicted to the motion and movement. I would go out to a bar with my friends and all I could think about was coming home and going for a power walk. I craved it like the body craves air. When I stopped power walking, I started meditating like a crazy woman. I would do my clearing, cleansing and grounding in the morning for an hour and then I would do my kundalini meditation for an hour in the evening. I was obsessed. I wanted to meditate all the time. Lately my obsession has been communicating with spirit.
I am well aware of my patterns and tendencies. My challenge is to find balance. I'm a Libra Sun sign. Balance was always going to be a life lesson for me. Obviously I planned it that way before I came into the physical. I need to find room on my plate for all the flavors and put it together to create a sweet spot. I want to be able to meditate, power walk, communicate with spirit, communicate with my friends, continue my spiritual studies, spend time doing outdoor activities and spending quality time fully present with my daughter. I KNOW I can do all of this this, I simply must make a choice and start....which I feel I have done just that this morning.
Today I feel I have new clarity and vigor to do my best to become the best me I can be. I have renewed focus on where I need to be and what I need to do to get there. I know in my heart that the key to many aspects of this human experience is BALANCE. Inner balance is needed to make us strong mentally, emotionally and physically to propel us forward. Outer balance is needed to keep us sane and maintain momentum. The act of learning to balance can be frustrating, but once we get to that beautiful point of equilibrium, we can achieve amazing things like the awakened kundalini, the end of fear, instantaneous manifestation and overall peace and joy in our lives...to name a few.
Now...time to practice what I preach and get off of here and outside.