They look the same, but they aren't the same.
It's so subtle that most won't recognize the difference, but there is a difference.
The one on the right is hyper focused on spirituality, personal growth, trusts easily and seeks companionship. She seeks knowledge and loves to analyze her dreams to understand herself better. She feels a lot and is compelled to express those feelings through her creations and written word. She is very focused on her inner world.
The one on the left feels much less. She's focused more on performing a daily work routine that results in income so needs can be met. She doesn't easily trust and prefers her own company to that of others. Spiritual growth isn't a focus for her and dreams aren't paid that much attention. She is more focused on the material external world.
The one on the right has disappeared. She vacated the driver's seat and the other one took over. We only realized it, recently, when we noticed the desire to create had completely disappeared. There are less ups and downs in emotions with the left one driving. She doesn't share much and simply looks forward to working.
It's a strange thing to recognize when an alternate persona has taken over the driver's seat. It's happened before when Bleu took over. He is a very mischievous and brash person. He approaches injustice very differently to the others. He is outspoken and loud.
No'ah is the funny one. He likes to laugh and play. Nothing is very serious to him...he is always in the passenger seat contributing randomly.
Does this realization mean DID is our diagnosis? Honestly, I think we all have alters who take over, but we don't always recognize them as unique separate personas who live within the vessel. We simply chalk it up to "I have writer's block" or whatever the switch might be for an individual.
No, it's not a block, it's a whole literal switch of who is controlling the body. A whole different persona has taken over and they don't have the same drive to create in the same way or the same interests. The sooner we recognize this about ourselves, the sooner we can honor each alternate persona and not beat them up for not being exactly like the others. We can just let them be and recognize what assets they bring to the table.
We like the angsty one, but she has stepped back and hasn't been answering her phone when we try to call her up. Maybe she will be back eventually, but the one in charge right now is a lot more stable emotionally, so it's a nice vacation for the body and is giving us the opportunity to heal the physical self which has been extremely neglected for so long.
Can you identify the different personas inhabiting your own physical vessel?
Do you honor and value them or are you always trying to get a different version of yourself back when they have taken a break?
