Beards, Selling Photos and Retirement Communities Dream

All Images by Caitlyn Grabenstein aka cult.class

Dream Journal Entry: November 21, 2020

Sooo many dreams. I will recall the last set first.

I dreamed that I was riding a tiny bike and I am in this community that seems to be for 50 and over. (Ugossip could easily be seen as a "retirement" community.) I stop and end up talking to some woman who seems very friendly. I am telling her that I live over on Sweetwater street and I rode my bike this way to get some fresh air and came to this community.

I think I went home and there was an odd scene where there was this very tall long blonde haired woman with a reddish beard but no mustache. (This made me think of one of Keanu's "beards" aka paid companions. More specifically, Amanda de Cadenet.) She parks her green pick-up truck in front of my house. I am staring at her from my window like neighborhood watch. She sees that I am watching and gets an angry, confrontational look on her face and is heading towards my door. I said out the window, "Do I need to call the police or do you want to talk about this?" She didn't respond and still looked angry. I repeated, "Do I need to call the police?"

She got in her green truck and moved it towards the back somewhere out of sight. I see her walking back towards the front and towards the left down the street to what I guessed was her apartment. I called to her, "Just so you know, I don't mind your truck being parked in front of my house. I'm okay with it." She turned and looked at me in surprise and I was smiling at her. She smiled back and seemingly taken back because it wasn't what she had expected.

Later, I am back at the woman's house who I met in the 50 and older community. I am surprised that she has several small children because typically these communities don't allow children to live in them. I'm looking around at her kids and they are all different ethnicities which makes me wonder if they are adopted. But then I  realized that, not only does she have several children, but she is very pregnant. I'm looking closer and she looks older than she had when I met her before and I was surprised someone older was still having babies. Her husband comes out who is a black man with longer hair. He seems younger than her and he is saying something about how he is REALLY fertile and that it didn't take long for her to get pregnant. I am surprised to learn the other kids are biologically hers which means they must all have different fathers. 

I am asking her about her birthing choices and telling her that I had a water birth. 

I see one of the little girls next to me take a bite of something green on toast. She took a big bite of it. I think her mom is indicating that the food had been for me but i smiled and said it was okay. I'm watching the child with the bite in her mouth but she didn't swallow. She lifts her head up and it is a perfect little tower of food and I laughed and said, "Wow! That's pretty impressive you can do that!" She laughed because it was a game to her.

I pondered this part of the dream as I woke and believe it was talking about someone taking what someone else had said into their mouth and regurgitating it back because it was a game to them. Not swallowing it means they don't believe it themselves, they simply repeated perfectly what was said.

Then later, it seems like there is a party happening and all of these people have shown up. There are several men surrounding the pregnant woman and I get the impression that "men are lining up to be with her." She seems to be annoyed with her husband for some reason and it comes out later the woman says to her husband, "I know you have been having an affair." I am seeing a younger woman with long blonde hair at the party that he had supposedly been having an affair with. The pregnant older woman was angry and they were having a discussion as I wandered away to take my leave.  

I started to go out the door when I noticed that there was a camera taking pictures of everyone as they left. There was a photographer who asked me if I wanted a picture of myself and I said, "Sure!" She took the photo and it seemed like a newer version of a polaroid that developed on the paper in seconds. She has lots of other pictures of everyone at the party and they start to fall from her hand and I tried to help her catch them. I then had a realization that maybe she was wanting money from the pictures. She shows me a pretty picture of the family and asks me if I want to buy it. I apologized and told her I hadn't actually planned to go to a party and had only stopped by for a short visit and I hadn't brought any money with me at all. She apologized and said she should have asked first before she snapped a shot of me. But it seems she was taking pictures of lots of party goers and trying to sell them.  (Pictures via hacked phones/devices of Ugossip users is what this made me think of.)

The scene jumps and instead of the party I am leaving, it feels like this photographer's house and now some shady people have shown up looking for her because she is missing. I leave down some front stairs before they noticed me. I had a sense that these people wanted to harm her if they found her. As I went down the stairs, I saw a very big gold bag of coffee beans had been delivered and left outside her door on the steps. (Coffee "wakes you up"... information that wakes you up.) I decided she wouldn't be back for it so I grabbed it and covered it with a nearby square blanket type fabric and took it with me. I recalled that it was the same delicious coffee they served at the pregnant woman's house and I liked it a lot. (This speaks to me of "Ugossip original", which I had shut down with a phone call, being the retirement community and the photographer's house being "Ugossip backup" opened by "Clown".) I knew that when it was gone, I wasn't entirely sure how I could get more.

Earlier dreams I remember less of now, but I remember making out with a guy for a long time. He is someone that others fear, apparently, but I didn't. I wanted to be with him. He was talking about how much older he is than me even though he looks really young. Apparently he is ancient.

I recall needing to pee and looking for a toilet. They were closed off because of Covid restrictions but I decided to ignore the barrier and go into the bathroom anyway. I go to find a toilet and other people were in there as well and had the same idea as me. Some woman comes near me and is pissing on my shoe and I got angry with her for doing this and grabbed her violently. I woke up needing to pee for real.

I also remember a bit about being stuck in Italy (Rose McGowan or Kim Reeves?). I remember feeling like I wanted to go home because I didn't speak the language here and working in a country whose language I didn't speak would be a challenge. I remember considering that I might be able to learn some basic italian to get by, but I would never be able to fully comprehend what people around me were saying. Then there was something about explosions going off and bombs falling from the sky. There was more to this dream but I can no longer remember.

Oh yeah, I just remembered a bit about seeing Emily F. and I had mentioned something about facial hair coming in on my face. She mentioned she had noticed and considered it was an imbalance of some specific thing...or maybe it was the presence of it. I can't remember the word she used. I told her mine was due to having reached menopause and I expect it is normal aging. She seemed to indicate she was sad that I was menopausal. I told her that I was 52 and one child was quite enough for me. I had no need for more. I wasn't sad about it and I didn't mind the changes that were taking place.