Written October 16, 2020
Today is my birthday... our birthday. I killed my soft and gentle masculine off and kicked him out of the body long ago at the age of eleven. He came back to me as a spirit hoping to be let back in. I had an experience I refer to as my "walk-in" when I felt an energy enter into me through my crown. It would take until now for me to fully understand that the energy that came into the vessel that day was my divine masculine who I now call Noah Lokahi.
August 30, 2013 I just had the strangest nap. I guess I didn't even realize I had fallen asleep at first. At some point there was realization that, yes, my body was asleep and my conscious mind was still awake. At some point I felt something in my head....and at the crown. I don't even know how to describe it. I told myself not to be afraid and to stay with it and asked myself what I saw. There was some poster in front of me and as I stared while this was going on with my head, the poster morphed in and out to something else but I couldn't make out the words. It was just enough to show me I was seeing into another dimension. At one point I heard a man singing something about "your twin soul is here" and I thought, "wait, what did he just say? That was a strange song i have never heard before."
When I reflect upon certain recent signs and syncs, I just smile. The number eleven has come up frequently. I had a dream about taking pregnancy tests twice and both times it came up with two lines for positive. Two positive pregnancy tests can easily be seen as 11 11.
Recently I was getting a free Vedic birth chart to see what my planetary placements were and I realized I typed my time of birth incorrectly. The site was using a 24 hour clock model. I typed in 11:00 but there was no AM or PM, so it read it as 11:00 AM. Once I realized my blunder, I went back to redo it and typed 23. It was at that point I had a huge "ah ha" moment. I have always associated 23 with River, but now I understand that 23 is also my number and it translates to 11.
Noah has been inside all of this time I have been looking for him outside of me. The journey helped me to remember him. It helped me get acquainted with him when I recognized certain qualities and attributes I just knew my perfect match would have. I got to know him in a way I wouldn't have had I not had this journey back to self.
I think it was realizing that all of the qualities that I wanted in a partner already existed in me is what helped drive it home that my perfect match was within me. I don't need to look out there anymore. I found my partner...my twin..my soulmate. Because of the journey, I know him incredibly well and have fallen madly in love with him.
He is within.
He has always loved me and always hoped that one day I would let him come home and sit on the intuitive heart throne next to me once again.
Happy Rebirthday to us.
Art by Marc Fishman |
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