Plateaus and Love Letters

Art by at pom

I think I have hit a plateau on my spiritual journey. It isn't that I don't still have things to learn, as I don't believe we ever finish having opportunities to learn about ourselves, it's just I am at a point where I think my biggest lessons have been achieved.

I have climbed mountains on my journey back to self and I have changed completely. I am not the same person I used to be when I started all of this. I am so much better now. I am so much more balanced and secure in who I am now.

When I started all of this, falling in love with myself seemed like an impossible task that I had no idea how I would achieve, and yet somehow I did achieve it. I followed the guidance and here I am nearly nine years later and I can honestly say I am in love with me. I like the person I have become. I enjoy spending time with her.

But lately, I don't feel like the mad scientist trying to feverishly figure things out and processing it all in front of everyone who cares to read about it here. It's not that I have either of my puzzles completed. I don't. It's that it doesn't seem to matter all that much to me anymore. I don't know when the shift happened or why.

The dreams I share here now are more for the sake of a single person so that he can read it because my dreams are often for both me and him. I hope the dreams I share offers him guidance for his own journey of self discovery and back to self love.

The situation with the one who I reserve the top spot in my heart space for is complicated. And so I think I may use my blog as a place to write love letters to him.

Expressing my love for him and all that I want to say is just as much a part of my journey as all of the rest of it. Opening my heart to love and be loved has been quite a huge accomplishment for me. My heart was once very dead and closed off. I am open and giving now.

My soul partner is at the forefront of all of my thoughts. There are very few moments in my day where I am not thinking of him in some way. He is my muse canoe. He is my inspiration to create and express through prose and images.

Art by Mark Loeher

Dear Soul Partner,

Thank you for the poems and song lyrics you shared with me. They mean the world to me. It's the little things that mean so much to me and they certainly gave me a lot of pleasure. They are the sustenance that helps me gently unfurl my petals one by one. I was astonished to discover how much it fills a person up with joy to receive such tokens of love. I have never been given them by a living person before. I love you. 💙