Monday, December 17, 2012

Signs, Synchronicities, and Spirit Guides

I spoke in a earlier blog post about finding the Channeling Erik site, how it resonates so much with me and has changed my life for the better in many ways. I want to tell you about some of things that occurred over the year prior to this.

It started when I was walking along a path and found a beautiful big crow feather. I remembered how I used to believe they were signs and gifts. Somewhere along the way I stopped believing and yet I kept the feather. Twice more I found big beautiful crow feathers. Sure, I could have explained it away and told myself it was just the time of the year crows molt and that it meant nothing...but the core of my being was saying something else. The fact that it occurred three times was significant to me. I knew there was something more to it but I really didn't know what. Maybe it was telling me simply, "Pay attention because more messages are coming."
 On another day, I was reading my Facebook feed and noticed two amazing owl related posts.

I thought it unusual and owls had never turned up in my feed before and twice within minutes they had shown up. I told myself, "Okay, if I get one more owl, I will KNOW this is a sign from the universe." It is the three thing. I had agreed to care for a friend's baby and when she brought her over, she was wearing a little owl onsie and owl socks. It made me laugh out loud. When I started going to this friend's house, her place had owls everywhere...on pictures, coffee cups, clothing, etc. I would take Baby O on walks and my attention, as if commanded by a voice, would be drawn to old owl statues.  
Owls, owls everywhere. I looked up the meaning and although significant at the time, it didn't completely explain. I remember exclaiming in frustration once, "What do you want?  What do you mean and why do I keep seeing you?!!"  
I do believe things eventually unfold and things become clear, but I was wondering if I was ever going to have that "ah ha" moment of understanding the message the Universe was trying to convey to me. Did I mention that I am REALLY impatient? lol

I started posting the owls that I was coming across to show one of my friends that "see, here is another one!" And by doing this, my Facebook friends actually started to think I loved owls. Well okay, now I do, but I didn't at the time.  People started posting owls on my Facebook wall. People started thinking of ME when they saw owls. And I still didn't know what the meaning was.  I just had to laugh. 

One day, on a walk, I found an owl feather. I thought of it as a gift that was meant for me. I still have it displayed on my wall.
Repeating numbers is the other thing that those silent voices were (still are) drawing my attention to. 11:11 would appear over and over. I saw 333 three times in a one hour period of time while out walking with a friend. Sometimes it was 444; sometimes it was 1222; sometimes 911. These numbers keep coming up and I keep looking up their meanings at the Sacred Scribes site and take comfort in their messages.

I found themes in the messages I was seeing on my FB feed and would know that the Universe had a hand in what messages I was seeing because they were exactly what I needed in those moments. The one I kept ignoring was that I was being told in lots of different ways that I need to meditate. I resisted for a long time, but have since given in and started meditating daily.

I came to a point where I desperately wanted more direct and open communication with my spirit guides. One night I sent a silent message out to my guides requesting this kind of communication before I fell asleep. I wanted to know them and work with them instead of against them.  That night I was given a dream. I dreamed of a person that was familiar to me, but I had never known when he was living. All night I dreamed of him. I would wake and go back to sleep and continue dreaming of him.  His name kept going through my mind, "River Jude Bottom". I woke in the morning with a start and wondered what that was about and tried to remember what it was that I had thought of before I went to sleep. When I remembered, I thought, "Oh my god, River is my spirit guide!"
Not entirely convinced at this point, I went on a quest online to see if others had said that River was their spirit guide too. I typed in the words "river phoenix spirit guide" and the Channeling Erik site was one of the sites that showed up on the first page. I clicked on it and went to the channeled interview and read.  I was both open and skeptical while I read. It was when I reached the part where River said, "The owl is my favorite animal, and blue is my favorite color!" I suddenly felt flushed and a light bulb went off. This is why all those owls have shown up in my life. It was leading up to this one point so that I would believe and know without doubt that he was my guide. I was floored. The part of the interview where Elisa asks if River has a message for humanity and he says, "My message to humanity is, ‘Look at people not for what they show you, but for who they are inside.’" really resonated with me. He also said his life's work now is, " To learn to love himself and start bringing the healing arts—whether it’s music, acting, hands-on healing back to earth." Again, this resonates deeply with me. I struggle so with loving myself, but I am working on it. I suspected that since I am neither a musician or actor, he must be here to help me learn the hands-on healing arts. I guess that is when I was first given a glimpse of what my life purpose is while I am here in physical form.
After this revelation, things started happening. Lights started going off and on.  Bulbs started burning out. The computer turned off and then on without me touching it. The TV turned off and then on by itself while my daughter was watching the movie E.T. and was nearing the end of the movie where ET is getting ready to go back home with his people and was telling Elliot he would still be "here" and points to his head.
While I was watching the movie, "Powder" on YouTube, At a certain point it suddenly started playing from the beginning again. Because I had to work to find where I was in the movie I assumed the scene was significant and something I was being told to pay attention to. It was the scene in which the science teacher (Jeff Goldblum) was talking to Powder in an empty lunch room. The science teacher was talking about how he felt like Powder was what humanity would eventually evolve into in  thousands of years. The scene starts at 58:55.
A fortune cookie fortune turned up on my counter that definitely hadn't been there previously. It said, "You will receive unexpected support over the next week. Accept it graciously." And while I was on a walk that same day, I saw a license plate that had the letters "RJP III".  

While I was driving home one night, my attention was drawn to the right side of the road. The last half of a sign lit up in blue read "river". I looked back to the road and 6 lights on both sides of the highway turned on. I thought, "Okay, this could be River, but it really isn't that unusual for lights to go on when it is getting dark." No sooner had I thought that than 6 different lights further down the road turned off. I laughed out loud.

I have wondered, "Why did he choose me out of all the billions of people on this planet?" But, why not me, right? If like attracts like, River and I are very similar souls with similar core issues. When I look back at my life now and 20 years ago, I have to laugh at how much more of a hippie I am today than I was all those years ago....and I know in my heart that River must have had a hand in some of the directions I have gone in my personal life and choices. I don't think myself "special" because River is my spirit guide. I think our guides are guides to lots of people...and not always as their most recent incarnation on this Earth. 

So when I asked Erik (through Jamie) about the identity of one of my spirit guides (River) and he refused to answer because he said I needed to start trusting myself and my own feelings, I know he is right because I really have been given all the confirmation I need. It is true that I need to stop doubting myself and my own senses.

I found out the recording for the conference call I was on has been inadvertently lost. I think this was the work of my guides because they knew I would put too much importance on the words that were spoken. I would over analyze it and make myself crazy and confused as I sometimes do. 

I love River for being there for me and welcome his presence in my life, but it was finding out that my beloved dog, Phoenix, my maternal Grandfather and my Great Aunt were also spirit guides that moved me to tears. The realization of being loved so much by them was overwhelming and made me shed tears of joy. To all of my spirit guides and angels, I thank you for all of your love and support. I am so very blessed.