Wednesday, August 24, 2016

You're So Childish

My daughter as wee thing.

Today I was told that I am childish by a Sum 41 fan for expressing some thoughts and opinions as though being childish is a bad thing. Hahaha Nevermind that I already know that few people are like me or think like I do, it doesn't stop me from sharing my thoughts even when I know the vast majority can't even begin to comprehend my perspective. They just aren't there yet and that is okay. I am used to resistance and backlash but being called childish made me laugh and think "I wish!"

Me and my daughter.
Children, especially young ones, are amazing little curious creatures. There are so many reasons why I would love to be more childish. Children navigate their world with their hearts wide open. They haven't closed off and shut down because of life experiences and being taught that is how to deal with difficult situations. Children love easily, forgive easily and they take enjoyment in the smallest of things. They believe anything is possible and their imaginations help them see all the possibilities. Imagination creates and their untainted minds create magical worlds.

We seem to try to snuff out their childish natures earlier and earlier and that is a tragedy. We do it by trying to make them learn more earlier instead of just allowing them the freedom to explore and learn on their own terms and in their own way through play. We see the bright, pure lights illuminating their little bodies dimmed greatly by the pressures and expectations we put on them to perform at a specific level and in a certain way.

Sometimes a troubled home life robs them of their light as it did with me.

I was recalling in a comment elsewhere about some of my experiences I had that I cherished. Moments like hanging out with the band School of Fish on their tour bus and watching as one of the members took a bite from every (square) slice of pizza and carefully put it back together so that his fellow band mates would have a surprise when they got on the bus and opened the box to have a piece of pizza. I also recalled the night that I hung out all night with the band Soul Asylum after their show. I watched as some of the members took turns riding the super long skateboard that belonged to my friend whose house we were at. I was invited to go skinny dipping with them at Stephen's Lake but opted to hang back at the house and chat with the drummer, Grant, until the sun came up.

While I was reflecting on the memories, I also remember how inhibited I was. I remember how self-conscious I was. I was so cautious and fearful. I was old at the age of 20 and I didn't know how to get that playful childish spark back. I even wrote lyrics about it. I wanted to be able to cut loose and just have a good time but I was so closed off and so shut down. All I could do is observe from the sidelines. Yes, I was there for those moments. Yes, they are happy memories but the person I am today is so much less much less closed. I could see the now me being able to laugh and play with them and not just observe everyone else having a good time.

I can feel now.

I can laugh.

I can cry.

I am funny and I love to joke around.

Sometimes I am downright childish and I like it.

I have lots of room to grow so I can become more child-like, but I have made progress in that direction.

Friday, July 22, 2016


I originally posted this as a comment elsewhere and thought it was worth posting here as well since it probably fell on deaf ears where it was originally posted:

“I found my God in music and the arts, with writers like Hermann Hesse, and musicians like Muddy Waters, Howlin' Wolf, and Little Walter. In some way, in some form, my God was always there, but now I have learned to talk to him."

~Eric Clapton

I grew up in an extremely religious household so prayer was a forced part of my every day life growing up. I wasn't so keen on the prayer at meals or the prayer on our knees, but I did actually enjoy my conversations with God before I fell asleep at night. They were quiet whispers in my head. Even though I had been taught I needed Jesus as a go-between to talk to God, I just dialed up God directly every night anyway. lol My prayer to God gave me a place to talk about things I didn't think I could talk about with anyone else and it carried on well into my 20s.

I'm not sure when it was I stopped praying. I can't tell you when I started to think that maybe there was nothing at all out there. I just know that at a certain point I stopped believing in anything and called myself an atheist.

I think we sometimes have to tear down all of our beliefs so that we can rebuild with a new foundation. I had to get to a point where I believed in nothing so that I could slowly start to discover what my spiritual truths actually are now.

Trauma from my childhood left me disdainful of Christianity. My knee-jerk reaction was to roll my eyes and completely disregard anything remotely christian based.

Fast forward to now and I have come to a new understanding of many things. I see prayer as being a three-fold thing:

1. It can focus intentions and intention is what creates the world around us.
2. It can be that time to talk to our people on the other side...our guides, our loved ones.
3. It can be a time to plug into our God-selves and have a direct line to much needed insights.

I have come to a place where I believe what we call "God" and what we connect to is actually a spark within ourselves since we are all an aspect of Source/God. I sometimes call my God self "my higher self" because I truly believe when we connect to God, it is simply a much bigger part of our spiritual selves.

Photo By Cory Richards
I can now see how certain traditions in Christianity got praying before meals. Again, it is about intention and when you infuse your food with gratitude and give thanks, it actually gives it a boost and makes it higher vibrational. Think of Dr. Masaru Emoto and his work with water and how using different words and phrases actually changed the shape of the water crystals. Gratitude is powerful. I think Yeshua/Jesus understood this and tried to share it with his followers and somewhere along the way the reason behind it got lost. Yeshua was a lot more new age than people realize. I wrote a blog about him recently and what his message actually was should you want to read it.

Friday, July 15, 2016

When We Resist Change

Art by Julie Miller/Haggis Vitae Studios
There are lots of different types of changes that can take place in one's life. Big changes, little changes and changes you don't even realize you have made until one day you suddenly find you are a completely different person.

So many times we hear:

"Change yourself and change the world."


"Be the change you wish to see in the world."

But how many of us are willing to actually go within and change ourselves? I mean REALLY change, not just superficial bullshit. I mean, how many of us are willing to go inside, turn ourselves inside out, face, embrace and tame our shadow selves? How many of us are willing to look at ourselves, our beliefs truthfully and let go of beliefs that no longer serve us? How many of us are willing to embrace new ways of thinking when they are trying to make their way into our consciousness and wake us up?

I was raised to be racist. I was raised to think that being gay was an abomination. I was taught intolerance and hate. It was taught to me from an early age. I was fortunate enough to be presented with different situations and opportunities by the universe to help me change and let go of beliefs that were both untrue and damaging. Life gently knocked on my door by giving me opportunities to change. Most of the time I answered the door and accepted the opportunities that were given to me and, over time, I evolved and changed. It wasn't over night. It was gradual like a river cutting away at a rock.

Sometimes we are stubborn and don't answer the door to change when it comes knocking. It keeps coming back presenting us with different situations. Maybe it just comes by way of people offering new information and you simply reject it over and over. And then the Universe brings it to you again trying to get you to pay attention. When I say "Universe" I really mean our own higher selves because I believe fully that it is ourselves guiding us and bringing certain opportunities into our lives to grow and change.

So, again, you reject the opportunity and fail to answer the door to change. So change says, "Okay, I gave you a gentler route, but now we will play rough" and suddenly shit happens in your life...devastating shit that brings you to your knees. Maybe you will cry out, "Why me?!!!" And I will tell you it is because you didn't answer the door to change when it came knocking, so it came back with a bomb to dismantle your world so that you are forced to rebuild from the foundation up.

A wise person, at this point, would allow the devastation they have suffered to transform them and change them from the inside out, but I have seen plenty of people who just aren't getting the lesson and they suffer blow after blow until they get it. There are some who just never will "get it". There will be some who will wade through the shit until the bitter end of their life. And some will finally embrace and welcome change and become better people as a result.

What will you choose?

Did you hear that?

"While I nodded, 
nearly napping, 
suddenly there came a tapping, 
As of some one gently rapping, 
rapping at my chamber door." 

~Edgar Allan Poe, The Raven

Tuesday, June 7, 2016

Symbolism is Everywhere, Sum 41 - 13 Voices Cover Art

Recently there has been a big hullabaloo over in Sum 41 fandom. Someone leaked Sum 41's new album cover and the list of the new songs on the album. Everyone was buzzing about it. "Is it real?" Personally, I knew it was real because it is simply a more polished version of something Deryck used for the Happiness Machines back when he was dipping his toes in the water and getting re-acclimated to performing live again after his brush with death and year long recovery. I had already made the comparison then of the Happiness Machine symbol to a Phoenix and posted it on Instagram but took it down later.

Shortly after the buzz started, Sum 41 and Hopeless Records made the official announcement because the proverbial cat was already out of the bag. Yes, the leak was real.

Fans had a lot to say about the album art and some were pretty critical saying how awful it was. I had my own thoughts I put out there and some of them were about the symbolism of the album art that they all were obviously missing and oblivious to. Because I am a prolific dreamer, I have learned a lot about symbolism. I feel strongly that all of those same symbols can be applied in our waking state too. Deryck may not have consciously known the symbolism that was tucked neatly into his creation, but our subconscious always knows.

Part of my comment on Facebook:
I read some of the comments. Some of you have no vision or understanding about how art mimics something and eludes to it. There is a lot of symbolism here. The shape of the cross combined with the winged dragons mimics a PHOENIX without actually portraying a phoenix. Phoenix, of course, is a symbol of death and rebirth. The red of the wings represents both fire and taking flight. The skulls represent death. A circle is feminine energy and speaks of cycles....things coming full circle. It also represents the ring that Deryck wears on a necklace. The straight lines of the cross are masculine and with the two together you have balance...yin and yang, masculine and feminine.

"Number 13 is made up of the attributes and energies of the numbers 1 and 3. Number 1 brings it vibrations of new beginnings, striving forward, motivation and progress, attainment and fulfillment, uniqueness and individuality. Number 3 relates to optimism and enthusiasm, communication and self-expression, inspiration and creativity, expansion and growth, manifesting and manifestation. Number 3 also relates to the Ascended Masters. Number 13 is the number of traditions, hard work, organisation and right judgement. The Number 13 is also a feminine number and suggests that you tap into your intuition."


I touched upon the meanings in my comment but what I want to do is look at the symbolism with more depth.

Right away the first thing I see is that the cross and dragon combination mimics the look of a Phoenix.

Phoenix - death and re-birth, transformation, change, metamorphosis, feminine, flight, fire, new beginnings

If you know about the use of the Phoenix in Asian culture, you know that usually where there is a Phoenix, you will also see a Dragon. Many traditional Asian weddings will use the Phoenix and Dragon image as a symbol of balance and unity. Traditionally the Phoenix in Asian culture is considered feminine and the Dragon is considered masculine. Essentially what you have when they are together is a prettier version of yin and yang symbol.  In the album art they are part of the whole. They are hidden in plain sight. Maybe your eyes will only see the dragons and not the phoenix, but they are together as one being much in the same way that humans are a balance of both masculine and feminine.

Dragon - strength, courage and fortitude, masculine, fire

These dragons have wings which speak of flight reaching new heights as does the phoenix because of their ability to fly and rise above. Dragons are often associated with fire as well and are often depicted spewing forth fire from their mouths.

At first glance you see a cross. It looks like a Celtic cross to me and my research into Celtic crosses showed me that no one really agrees on a definitive answer, so I will break it down as I did before and describe what I personally see.

Because I have been following the band for 2 years and studying Deryck like he is a subject in school, I know that the cross I have spotted him wearing recently is relatively new. He mostly just wears a ring as a pendent as though it is a good luck charm.

Circle - feminine, cycles, coming full circle, sun, fire element

The cross is actually a pretty interesting symbol and goes back way further than Yeshua/Jesus and the crucifixion. We tend to think of Christianity when we see a cross, but the symbol was used long before Yeshua came into being.

"Jung suggests that the cross has its origins in humanities discovery of fire, and as such, is in reality a fire symbol derived from primitive man's rubbing of two sticks together in order to start a fire for warmth, protection, and the creation of tools. It is interesting to note, that words signifying cross, such as krois, krouz, kreuz, crux, cruz, or croaz, possess etymological similarities with words signifying fire. The roots ak, ur, or os, all signify cosmic light or fire."

So again we have another symbol of fire. Two lines symbolizing two things coming together to create something powerful and valuable.

Cross - fire, creation, coming together

Now when the circle is on top of the cross, the inside of the circle then becomes the element of earth. Also it resembles the medicine wheel of the Native Americans which represents the 4 elements, 4 directions, etc.

Cross in Circle - earth, 4 elements, 4 directions, 4 seasons

Two skulls are depicted below the circle. They appear to have smoke coming out of their eyes which gives a sense of smoldering ashes. Skull, of course, is a powerful symbol of death, but, it is also part of the skeletal system and is bone. Bones are the strength and foundation of our core physical beings. Without them we would have a hard time moving around this fleshy vehicle. They are support.

Skull - death, ashes, change, endings, past

Bones - strength, support, foundations 

Interestingly, the skulls are placed in a position that could be seen as support and the foundation. It could also be viewed as the ashes of who he used to be....his former self.

We see the number 2 twice with two dragons and 2 skulls.

"Number 2 resonates with the vibrations and attributes of service and duty, balance and harmony, adaptability and diplomacy, co-operation and consideration, receptivity and love. Number 2 also relates to partnerships and relationships, intuition and insight, faith and trust and your Divine life purpose and soul mission."

And because 2 shows up twice we can add them together and get does the 1 and 3 of the "13 Voices"

"Number 4 resonates with the vibrations and energies of practicality, organization and exactitude, service, patience, devotion, application, pragmatism, patriotism, dignity, trust and trust-worthiness, endurance, loyalty, mastery, building solid foundations, conservatism, determination, production and hard work, high morals, traditional values, honesty and integrity, inner-wisdom, security, self-control, loyalty, conscientiousness, reality and realistic values, stability and ability, progress, management, justice, seriousness, discipline, system and order, maintenance, constructiveness, dependability and conviction. Number 4 also represents our passion and drive and encourages us to work harmoniously yet diligently to achieve our goals and aspirations. Number 4 is the number that represents the four elements of Air, Fire, Water and Earth, and the four sacred directions, North, South, East and West."

I already discussed the number 13 earlier but when you take 2+2+1+3 it equals 8. 8 is the number of abundance.

What about those voices? lol There are 13 of them. When you think about voice and the idea of 13 voices, I tend to think of 13 tones and resonances because no two voices are going to be alike. 13 voices in his head? Maybe. lol And maybe we can see it as 13 musical notes or tones. 13 different vibrations.

I almost forgot about the colors.

Black is dominant in this album cover and it is the yang/feminine part of the yin/yang symbol. Shadows are often seen as black but our shadow selves are nothing to be afraid of. Black is often the color of stones that are grounding and/or used for protection.

Red is the color of the root chakra. We often see red as being fiery. It is our survival center. I found this bit particularly apt from this site:

"The energy of Muladhara allows us to harness courage, resourcefulness and the will to live during trying times. It connects us with spiritual energies of our ancestors, their challenges and their triumphs."

And when you put it all together, it tells a pretty personal story about Deryck Whibley and all that he has endured in the last 2 years.

If you liked the number meanings, please make sure you visit the Sacred Scribes to find the meanings of the numbers showing up in your life.

Sunday, June 5, 2016

Manifesting, Gardening and Taking Action

I have been working hard towards achieving a specific goal and manifesting something in my life that I dearly want. Lately it feels like something that was stuck has become unstuck. Something has shifted and finally I am seeing movement in the direction I have been working toward. This makes me very happy but also makes me think about all of those well meaning people who said one or more of these things to me:

"If it was meant to be, it will happen."

"You don't have to do anything except just be"

"Relax and do nothing."

"Just let go and let happen what will happen."

"Stop trying to force things and let it just happen."

"Law of attraction...don't focus on it."

"Let it go and wait for your intention to manifest."

I am paraphrasing and these are just estimations of what people have said to me. Had I listened to all those well meaning bliss ninnies to just let it go, relax and do nothing...NOTHING is exactly what I would be getting right now. I would see no movement at all. I would be seeing no fruits of my labor. Sometimes the things we want and set up pre-birth for our lives requires a lot of work and perseverance. And just maybe that fire that drives us to keep going and not "let it go" knows something that those well meaning fuckwits don't know. I know what my guides have been pushing for better than they do. Giving up and doing nothing is not what they have been pushing me to do.

Making effort and taking action is not a bad thing and too much in the spiritual community people are preaching sitting back on our laurels and doing nothing because it will all magically come to you. Here in the physical world we have to take physical action to make our intentions happen.

All of this preaching about creating what you want in your reality with your thought is pretty much useless if you never dare to take a risk and take actions toward actually forming the reality you want to see. I am not saying there shouldn't be balance because I think there should, but just putting your hands behind your back and thinking everything will magically come to you, you are in for a rude awakening. I can say, "I really don't like it when people litter." and then I walk past a piece of litter I see and do nothing. I have just become part of the problem and my thoughts and actions are not matching. I am saying and thinking one thing and yet doing another.

If I say "I am hungry" and I try to manifest food with my thoughts alone and there is a store next door with food but I am so convinced that I can manifest it with my thoughts alone that I do nothing and end up starving to death, shall we say that was fate and meant to be? No. You would say I was a dumbass and should have walked my ass over to the store and bought some food.

Sometimes you have to take ACTION to make your intentions come to fruition.

When you grow a vegetable garden, you don't throw out your seeds willy-nilly and do nothing after. It takes a lot of work and care to produce a productive garden. You first have to break up the soil, remove the grass and weeds. You have to provide ample fertilization for what you are intending to grow. Then you have to form your rows and plant the seeds; mounds if you are planting squash; string and support for creeping vines and tomatoes. You have to take each plant into consideration and give them what they need. There is no one size fits all if you want to have a variety of plants in your garden. And after you plant them, you have to continue to watch them, nurture and care for them.  If it is a big enough garden, you may need to bring in a colony of bees to help make sure your flowers get pollinated. You have to make sure they have water. You have to try to keep the weeds out. You have to make sure critters aren't eating the fruits of your labor. If you are a really loving and doting gardener, you will end up with a beautiful productive garden. You will have many varieties of fruits and vegetables to harvest. But none of that happens without getting your hands dirty, getting on your knees and really giving it your best effort. It takes dedication, time and perseverance to grow a garden. None of that magically happens by simply wishing it into existence and using thought alone to manifest here in this 3D reality.

ALL of the above paragraph can be used as metaphors and examples for our lives. If you want to grow a garden in your life, it takes takes matching your thoughts with action. When you do that, just watch as you see your life take shape and blossom.

Monday, May 16, 2016

Navigating and Our Personal Journeys

Recently I had a conversation with a friend that left me with my feathers ruffled.

I am fairly certain she left the conversation feeling the same way.

I shared with her some of what had been going on in my life and shared some of the feelings I was experiencing. At no point did I ask for advice or help. I was simply expressing myself and sharing. I usually don't want advice or help and just want someone to listen. I don't need anyone to insert what they think is right or wrong or how they think I should handle it all. I am fairly adept at handling my own shit. Most of the time I want to talk about it and nothing more. I was pretty taken back when I got a barrage of unwelcome "help" and "advice" that was basically telling me how she thinks I should do things based on her interpretation of the limited information I gave her. I was shocked at her interpretation and her lack of understanding and compassion.

What I find interesting is that often the people who are most vocal about being "empaths" are the ones who seem to demonstrate the least empathy. Maybe it was just an off day for her because normally she is very kind, but she sure as hell was NOT feeling what I was feeling or she would have never said some of the hurtful things she did to me. I walked away feeling like she really just has no understanding of me and my journey at all.

The thing is, I am okay with her not being able to grasp or understand it fully but the barrage that followed even after I told her she didn't understand was eyebrow raising and made me feel annoyed for days. The meme below was what I was wanting to scream.

You might be surprised to hear me say that I am GRATEFUL to her for this experience. Being irritated by the conversation made a lot of things well up inside me that wanted to be expressed. Because of that interaction, I was inspired to write and write and write...and since writing is what I love to do, that isn't a bad thing. I have been able to talk about subjects that are important to me but were only mildly brewing inside. She helped bring it all to a boil and to the surface. So thank you to my friend for the inspiration. My friend provided the grains of sand that would provide the irritation to create some pearls of wisdom.

Now onto the meat of the topic I want to discuss today...

We all come into these lives with a specific journey we are intending to have. We all come equipped with an inner compass for navigation. We have our handy dandy spirit guides who help nudge us in the direction we intended for ourselves before we stepped into a skin suit and forgot everything we knew and planned. Maybe you planned to meet up with certain people and work together for a while but, always, our individual journeys are for us and us alone. I share my journey with all of you and understand that what you experience may be vastly different. The order you experience different phases in the spiritual journey may be different from the order I have experienced those same phases.

There is no right or wrong way in this journey called "life".

Maybe you don't hit all the markers and grab all the flags you intended to when you hit the top of the mountain and started swooshing downhill at record speeds, but you won't incur a "do-over" for missing the minor things. It is going to hurt if you go off course and maybe hit a tree or two. It may or may not slow you down, but you get back up on your skis and keep going.

I went through a phase where I thought everyone else knew more than me and had my answers to help me navigate my journey. I would seek out mediums and psychics and think they had so much more wisdom than me. Some of the information I got was just flat out wrong and bad. But some of the others weren't so overtly wrong and, for a time, I took their information into my navigation system. It was taking me all over the place in all kinds of funky directions. When I finally started to believe in me and trust me, I could look back and see that a certain dream was trying to show me this, but I didn't understand that is what it was trying to tell me until AFTER I had already gotten to the point of trusting myself and my own navigation.

August 28, 2014  Apparently I had gone on a trip to Europe or somewhere. I can't remember specifics but a big part of the dream was being on this giant plane. It seemed like we were on it for ages. I wanted the food I thought I had brought with me but it seemed to have disappeared. I thought maybe someone had taken it or perhaps they never put it on the plane as they were supposed to. Well we flew for a while but the plane stopped and we had something like a two hour layover, so I went into this city I was unfamiliar with to go find something to eat. I was riding around on a bike and the streets were busy. Two guys grabbed onto me to help propel me forward faster. I was like "what are you doing? I am new at this bike riding stuff. I don't want to go fast." And then we approached this stop light. We all stopped and I looked. It was a steep decline and I was scared. I was thinking, there is no way I can go down that on a bike. I will kill myself because I will go too fast. I wanted to get off and walk the bike down the steep hill. I don't actually remember traversing the hill but my concern was getting back to the airport on time and I kept seeing these lines on a map, but it was like the navigation was fucked and taking me in round-about ways instead of a direct route. I was feeling upset that I might miss my plane home. That is all I remember of that one.

So basically this navigation outside of me wasn't really getting me to where I wanted to be. It reminds me of a news story I saw recently about a 23 year old woman following her GPS navigation into a lake. lol Oops!

Here is the story.
If we are all basically an aspect of God/Source, then wouldn't it be a silly thing for us to send billions of people to have the exact same journey and to navigate it exactly the same way? Don't you think that we, as God, would be clever enough to throw in as many variables and variations as we can to get as many experiences as we can so we can take it in as part of our God-self? So please don't tell me how you think I should navigate my journey based on your limited knowledge of what is coming into me from my guides, your standards, your beliefs, and your overall personality. My journey is mine and yours is your own. I know all too well how tempting it is to "help" because I have been guilty of it myself and I had to learn to step back and just allow people to navigate their journey the way they feel best. I can offer my perspective if I am asked, but I am not them nor am I a sum of all of their parts. I don't actually know what is best for them or what they have set up for themselves pre-birth. It is very tempting to project onto people what is best for your own journey and not necessarily theirs.

I have had a well-meaning psychic/medium try to tell me that "the guides" told her this or that when: 1. I never gave my permission for her read me or access privileged information about me. Having a casual conversation is NOT implied consent. 2. I never gave permission to access communication with MY guides so who the fuck she was talking to, I have no idea. I just know they weren't MY people. In one particular instance, her interjection of what "the guides" were supposedly saying only succeeded in pissing me off and wanting to tell her to back the fuck up. I did tell her this was MY journey and mine alone and there was no way in hell she was privy to the mountains of details and daily interactions I have with my guides. For every dream I write down, there are 20 others I don't record. They just float around in my head and pop out when something triggers a memory. You should never presume you know my whole story by what little I do share. What I share is just the tip of the iceberg. Trust that I can navigate my own journey without your unsolicited advice and help. Trust that I am listening to my guides and doing exactly what I feel is the very best for me and my journey. Trust that even if I get shit wrong, it is okay and is what is best for me and what I need to learn. Trust that when I tell you I sometimes cry and feel sad that having these emotions are part of my journey and don't need to be avoided. Trust that I don't need to be fixed and that I am learning in leaps and bounds from my difficulties.

None of us have any real idea what the soul next to us planned to experience no matter how psychic, intuitive you are or how many spirits you talk to. We should be careful about inflicting our personal morals on each other because morals are mostly subjective. Some people adhere to the human laws of morals, but the morality of the soul in non-physical is very different. When your mind expands and you start to see the world through spiritual colored lenses, human morals seem quaint but not really applicable in a bigger picture sort of way. The journeys we plan for ourselves could look pretty messy. They could seem to be full of conflict and *gasp* immoralities. It isn't really for you or me to decide what is right or wrong for another person. All we can do is decide what is right for ourselves.

All of us are a sum of all our parts and that sum is unique to each person. Some people are all fluffy bunnies, kittens, fairy dust and unicorns. While I am over here all combat boots, bad-ass, brass knuckles and "fuck off." Neither one is a right or wrong way to be. To ask me to approach my journey like your fluffy bunny self is to ask me to ignore who I truly am. Do I have a soft squishy center? Absolutely! Does the fluffy bunny have a bad-ass center? It is very likely. But how we naturally navigate and operate through our journeys is going to look very different. We have to be willing to step back and just accept people for who they are and allow each other to operate in a way that feels natural and comfortable. You fluffy bunny people are perfect just as you are because our God-self wanted to experience what life was like that way. But our God-self also wanted to experience life as bad-ass, brass knuckle people too and those of us who appear hard on the outside are absolutely perfect the way we are as well.

By all means, love and support the people around you who are doing the best they can on their journeys, but allow them to use their own inner navigation to get them to their final destination.

Sunday, May 15, 2016

Processing and Interpretation

Interpretation is a funny thing. If I were to write something and have ten people read it, it is entirely possible all ten will take away something completely different when processing the meaning.

There are many factors to HOW we interpret the information coming into us.

I tend to believe that the date and time of our birth is no accident and has everything to do with pre-birth planning to ensure certain attributes are present in the characters we are about to play. We set it up so that we have specific personality traits to better help us have the experience we are looking to have and/or to aid us in completing a mission we agreed to take on prior to stepping into physical form. Regardless of what you believe about astrology and the influence of the cosmos on us, when we are born, we each come in being hardwired in specific and unique way.

Chemicals and hormones all play a factor in how we process things in our brains. So everything including the food you eat, the air you breathe, the water you drink, the chemical exposure you have in your environment, sun exposure, medications affect how we interpret. Fluoride is a neurotoxin and is in our toothpaste and the drinking water for many people. Many cities are highly polluted so the air can be toxic. There are preservatives and dyes in food. There are preservatives and aluminum in personal hygiene products that can disrupt hormones. The level of activity you have and where you do said activity can have an impact on our brains and how we process.

Add into that mix every single experience we have ever had in our lives. And oh, hey, let's throw in some past life baggage you brought with you to this life. Even if you have had similar experiences to another, it will affect us all differently. Think of siblings in a family who all suffer the same abuse and see how differently they each are affected.

No two people are identical in how they process and interpret. Each person is a unique cookie recipe. You can use the same ingredients in slightly different amounts and come up with some very different results. Textures, flavors, and colors will be different.

Vector - Photo by Dan Mountford

We are a sum of all our parts. That sum determines how we process information and that sum is always changing.

With this in mind, is it any wonder that I could write something and one person sees it as harsh and pushy, while another person might see simply honest forthright expression. One person gets their feathers ruffled while the other person doesn't see it as a big deal. Maybe the person it was intended for even respects and appreciates what I wrote while the other wants me to alter my behavior and change how and what I say. Not everyone will process the same written words exactly the same way. Some are going to hate it, some are going to love it, and some will have no idea what you are even talking about.

It would be an error to assume that everyone will interpret exactly as you do. I mean, isn't this part of the reason we have so many misunderstandings since social media became a thing? It is VERY easy to interpret what you are reading in a voice that was not intended by the author. You might read me as angry when, in fact, while I was writing, the voice in my head was earnest and heartfelt.

We can't walk around trying to be people-pleasers, second guess ourselves or second guess everything we say and do at every turn. We just have to be exactly who we are without fear and without regret. If we please ourselves by being completely authentic to who we are, then we have done something right.

As Chris Cornell yourself is all that you can do.

Thursday, May 12, 2016

Forgiveness, Super Mario Brothers, Leveling Up

I recently responded to some comments in In My Sacred Space Facebook group about my blog post from yesterday and felt like what I explained is worthy of its own blog post. I have talked a lot on this blog about how we are each living out our own personal plays. I have made references to this experience being a game we are trying to complete. It isn't surprising to me that someone doesn't agree with me about the whole "Jesus dying for our sins" issue because people like that sense of a safety net....that sense of an easy out when they are knee deep in the shit and they fucked up.

Forgiveness shouldn't be that complicated for us as a species and yet it seems to be, so we create this fantasy that this magical man died so that our slate could be wiped clean. That just isn't what Yeshua came here for. He was just a man. Yes, he was an extraordinary man but he wanted to show us all the cheats on how to complete the level. He never wanted to become some pseudo deity. He never wanted to be worshiped in the way he is currently. He never wanted to be the excuse for wars and atrocities we commit toward each other in his name. He just wanted to show us how to Level Up. He was leading by example, as we all should. 

It was foretold of his coming but what if he was simply the human equivalent of game cheat video on YouTube showing us exactly how to get through the level? I think that is exactly what Yeshua was....the Way Shower for how to get the fuck out of this level. We have been in this level for so long that we have forgotten it is just a game. We have been here so long we have forgotten we aren't actually the characters we are playing. 

It is time to wake up and remember WHILE we are in the physical. The key is to forgive NOW, to remember who we really are NOW while in the physical and playing the game. It is no good if you only remember once you kill off your character and go to the other side and get ready to jump back in. If you can let go of your physical attachments, let go of the hurt and pain and anger through forgiveness, if you can apologize to those you have wronged while you are get to Level Up which is basically "ascension". I mean, what does it actually mean to ascend? Think about it.

I think while we are here in the physical, we have a responsibility to each other to not be assholes and actually give a fuck about each other. That was something that Yeshua was famous for...helping others and being of service. He lived a life that was heart-centered. He cared about others and saw everyone as equal no matter their social status, their profession, their gender, their sexual preference. He just loved them all and was of service to those in need.

We have become a society of greed and self-centeredness. We care more about buying things and more things to fill the void we have inside of ourselves. If only we could understand that things will never fill the void. Our consumerist lives will be the death of the planet if we cannot change and become a heart-centered species rather than self-centered. Love is what that void is craving. When we truly love ourselves in a non-materialistic sense, we can then give love easily and freely.

User 1:
Very interesting. And except for the forgiveness i agree with you and lets keep spreading the truth

Me: What do you believe about forgiveness? 

User 2: Hmmmm depends on the dastardly deed ...

Me: If you know this is actually just a play and we are all performing parts in it, no matter how dastardly the deed is, if we can be cognizant that the soul inside is just playing a role and forgive and forgiving means being able to move up a level in this whole experience, why wouldn't you do it? When a character on stage kills another character, do we hate the actor who played the role? No, because we understand that it isn't all that real. And what we learn, if we have explored spirituality long enough, is that there is a whole lot of planning and choice that goes into the roles we ultimately choose to play when we come to Earth. We know full well the tumultuous life or easy life we could be living.

Think about video games and how when you play and meet new challenges you use a life trying to understand the level. So you keep coming back to the same level over and over and over again until you finally learn how to navigate the new level. I once played Super Mario Brothers for Super Nintendo with my sister-in-law for 13 hours straight. hahahaha When we got to where we had to fly to get through the level, it took us many lives to get to the point where we could finally figure out how to fly and make it to the end of the level.
Nevermind that we were waving our controllers all around in the air as though that would help the process any. lol That is what we are doing here on earth...using up life after life to navigate through the level. Earth is just one level we have to navigate.

The game we are playing is the one of separation from source. We are playing at this idea we are individuals and then with each level we accomplish, we are a level closer to God. The goal is to get back home and integrate in. And once we are back, we start the game all over again. It is some crazy shit but true and some of which can be found in Dolores Cannon books.

Moving up a level is what I mean by getting off the hamster wheel. We keep playing the same level over and over again and it is time we finally get it. So here we are, people like me, you, Ashley and everyone in this community offering cheats to explain to people HOW to beat the level if they follow our advice. That is all Yeshua was really doing. He was offering cheats on how to finish the level finally.