Wednesday, March 25, 2020

Making Stone Soup with Celebrities

Art by Emily Balivet
Celebrities seem to be a theme on my spiritual journey and I have written about them a lot. A lot of the clues I have gotten from my guides pertain to celebrities. People often question and criticize the celebrity involvement in my journey. They simply don't understand because their journey is so much different.

What people sometimes forget is that there are no "wrong ways" on the journey back to self as long as you are continually and consistently growing as you go along. For me, mine started with River Phoenix in a powerful dream. It started my crash course back to self disguised as a Scooby Doo Adventure and sometimes search for "The One".

There was one morning I heard in my in-between state, "Ed Stone is River". It took me until recently to fully understand the meaning of that statement. I kept wondering who Ed Stone might be. Fast forward to now and I understand the meaning of "Ed Stone".

Art by Emily Balivet
Education Stone....stone soup.

Most of us are familiar with the story of stone soup. What brought it all home into cohesive thought was a comment from a message board user who believes they are talking to Keanu Reeves on social media. It is easy to laugh and say "Nigerian scammer" and it might well be that. The thing is, how can I judge when I myself have had an ongoing belief that I have communicated with Keanu Reeves under an alias. I mean, it doesn't stop there. I actually believe he has been hacking my phone and spying on me as a means of some sick and twisted game of his.

It is my BELIEF and, because it is my belief, it is true for me in those moments even if it isn't actually Keanu at all. I am behaving and responding like that person is the real deal. The lessons I get from the whole experience are real no matter if the initial belief was false.

Art by Emily Balivet
This is a comment I made in response to someone who feels they are talking to Keanu:
I can tell you that the belief it is Keanu talking to us can shape us, even if it isn't him.
I will probably never know who was or who wasn't actually him, but the journey helped shape me and I am a better person as a result. 
It is like making stone soup. Keanu or River, or Brandon or anyone can be the stone that we put in the pot. Our belief in the value of the stone and its contribution can be what causes us to keep throwing ingredients into the pot until we end up with this delicious soup. But there is so much soup now that we want to give it freely to others and say, "Here! Have some of my stone soup! It is so delicious!" The pot is us and the soup is the journey of all that we learned and gained along the way.
Maybe it is Keanu and maybe it isn't. As long as we are growing from the experience, the belief, false or true, can aid in our growth if we allow it.
Art by Emily Balivet
If the beliefs we hold in any given moment leads us to the lessons we need in order to peel another old layer away of who we are no longer, who cares if the celebrity is really participating or not? They are participating in the sense that they are the reason for those specific lessons.

If what we end up with at the end of the journey is rebirth and transformation of self, does it really matter how we got there as long as we did? If what we get is a reunification of our own inner feminine and masculine, does it really matter if we never hook up with that celeb we thought we were talking to? 

Art by Emily Balivet
Succeeding in sacred internal union and balance is no small task. However we get there, no matter how crazy or ridiculous it seems to another, we should celebrate and congratulate ourselves for achieving something that will benefit this entire reality as a whole.

In light of all that is occurring in the world, it is likely that many will start the journey back to self while they are stuck at home. This comment I made at the same message board feels relevant to this discussion:

I refuse to live my life paranoid no matter who is watching. I refuse to hide in fear and be anyone other than who I am. I choose to trust. I don't trust naively. I trust because what we put out into the world is the energy that comes back to us. I choose to love with an open heart because I know my world is shaped by the love I put into it.
I have no control over the actions and behaviors of others. All I have control of are my own perceptions and how I process what I have experienced at the hands of another. I get to decide if I will let it kill me or if it will simply become the fertilizer that helps me grow. 
Growth is a choice to learn from all experiences and not just the pleasant ones.
Art by Emily Balivet
May you all grow and transform on your personal journeys. 

Tuesday, March 17, 2020

Naming My Divine Partner

Photo by Nina Leoni
Sacred hermaphrodite
A sacred union, internally
Feminine and masculine.
Harmoniously combined

Feminine on the outside
She already has a name
Dear masculine partner
What shall we name thee?

No'ah Lokahi shall be our masculine name.

No'ah is said to have gathered masculine and feminine of various species of animals so they could continue and reproduce and replenish the population after the great floods. Symbolically, this can be seen as a time of great emotions while bringing together masculine and feminine of each chakra within our own vessel that is us.

"Lokahi is an ancient Hawaiian word with many layers of meanings. For Maka’ala Yates, lokahi is the essence of unity, peacemaking, harmony, connection, and embracing diversity. Ho’o lokahi is the action that brings about agreement, diversity, and unity. But it is much more than this.

In the Hawaiian language there are tones, sounds, and meanings within meanings that carry vibrational frequencies of understanding, mana [life force], and healing. As Maka’ala explains, Lokahi is the platform upon which to communicate and illuminate healing and more importantly, to reunite that which has been broken back into unity, and awareness—in short, to renew a way of life."

https://manaola.wordpress.com/2014/09/23/in-the-spirit-of-lokahi/

Art by Andrew Gonzalez
What's In A Name?

I posted the above on Instagram in the wee hours of the morning and am posting it here because I think it is important to talk about.

On the spiritual journey we spend so much time searching for our divine partner. In fact, it is the carrot dangled before us to motivate us to do the internal work we need to do. We travel places internally we have never traveled before.  We start to face our fears, our trauma , our hidden pain. Parts of our old selves die off and fall away with each lesson we learn. With each little change we make to embody the highest version of ourselves, we climb a little further up the mountain we have been traversing.

Illustration from Aurora consurgens Book by Thomas Aquinas

I have mentioned before that I feel like I became so dead inside, that my softer, gentler, kinder masculine side died and became the spirit by my side following me around, begging me to let him back in. The below dream, I believe, marks the day that he stepped inside the human vessel with me and was able to help guide me in our dreams.

Dream Journal Entry: August 30, 2013.
I just had the strangest nap. I guess I didn't even realize I had fallen asleep at first. At some point there was realization that , yes, my body was asleep and my conscious mind was still awake. At some point, I felt something in my head and at the crown. I don't even know how to describe it. I told myself not to be afraid and to stay with it and asked myself what i saw. There was some poster in front of me and as i stared while this was going on with my head, the poster morphed in and out to something else but i couldn't make out the words. It was just enough to show me i was seeing into another dimension. At one point i heard a man singing something about "your twin soul is here" and i thought, "wait, what did he just say? That was a strange song i have never heard before."

I still couldn't remember him and needed a lot of assistance, so  he guided our feminine, from within, to lessons that would help her remember, help her bring those aspects of the masculine forward into an outward expression. Together, we resurrected him and restored him to his rightful place on our heart throne beside her. Together they rule as a United being, each offering their strengths and giving way when the other is needed in a specific situation.


A friend recently said that there was a definite duality about me. I laughed because I could see the truth in this. One part of me is incredibly serious, very spiritual, nurturing and a little bit hard. I see this one as my sacred feminine, Oktobre. Then there is this other one who is completely irreverent, very funny but also very kind and soft. I see this one as my sacred masculine.

All of those qualities I say I want in a physical partner, my inner masculine possesses. He is my beautiful and amazing divine counterpart but he no longer has a name of his own.


I felt strongly that I wanted to honor my sacred partner by giving him a new name...rather like Atreyu did with the Princess in the Neverending Story.


Names hold vibration both in the numerology and the meaning. I wanted to choose a name for him that he had not worn before. I wanted it to be new and represent his significance of who he is to me. I wanted to give him a voice through having his own identity within this vessel.

So now there will be times that I can write, "No'ah says..." or "No'ah feels..." Because sometimes he has different thoughts and feelings than Oktobre. I think it is fair to honor and love him in this way as it is yet another layer of the deepest, purest form of self love and self respect.

What will you name your divine partner?

Do you both need a new name to start fresh?

How are you honoring your internal sacred partner who can't be seen externally?