Freedom Flight of Thought

I was searching old journals to compile a timeline of sorts of my journey. I came across various nuggets of gold buried in the shit that I didn't remember writing. The below are a couple of those nuggets and what was sort of a forward of what the notebook was intended for. Unfortunately, it did end up becoming a journal and the majority of my journal material is mostly throw away.

I spoke a lot about God and to God in my writing, which feels cringey when I go back to read, but it is interesting reading it with my new perspective of who and what "God" actually is.

September 1990
This is not a journal of the day to day events of my life, although the day to day events will affect it. This is a journal of my thoughts, thoughts transferred to paper with pen.

Our thoughts are what makes us individuals. Without thought, we would all be cars without drivers. A car without a driver goes nowhere.

You do not have to go through years of school in order to think. School merely trains you to think in a process that is usually analytical. It teaches us to think alike. A highschool diploma is not required for individual creative thought. I know this, for I do not have that piece of paper in which society would like us to believe we need in order to exist. Before there were schools, God and nature were our teachers. God is who I credit for my knowledge and the only teacher I trust.

Thoughts influence our decisions, what we like, what we do, who we see.... basically everything connected to choice and some things not connected to choice.

Society is now trying to ban things we say, do and hear. They are trying to ban opinions but they can never ban your thoughts  our thoughts belong to us. They can chain our feet, tie our hands behind our backs, put earplugs in our ears, blindfolds over our eyes and tape our mouths, yet they cannot stop us from thinking. They can even kill our brains, yet thought will never die for our thoughts are actually who we are, our souls ARE thought. So if souls never die, neither does thought.

This is my Freedom Flight of Thought.

September 23, 1990 - This day seems insignificant, nothing outstanding has happened, yet every day is significant because it connects us to another day. Significance is not something we can accurately measure. I am only one but isn't one something?

I began to wonder what God was, if there was a God and then I began to doubt. I became miserable. They say "God is Love". Without God there is no love. If I doubt the existence of God, am I not also doubting the existence of Love?

October 24, 1990 - And there's that voice again! "DON'T RELY ON PROOF, RELY ON BLIND FAITH. DON'T WONDER HOW HE FEELS ABOUT YOU...KNOW AND BELIEVE HE DOES LOVE YOU. BELIEVE IT AND SO IT IS." Stupid voice drives me crazy sometimes...but that voice knows plenty of things I've never even thought of. I guess I should at least try, huh?